The blogs are back! Yay! Who knows for how long already, I've been MIA again. But here I am. So what's new? I got the confirmation for my work placement which will start in September and now I also know who'll be the professor who'll lead the seminar I have to visit during the work placement. It's the one who'll take care of me and my thesis! Great coincidence.

Now the lucky sentence again.

Lucky sentence:

You don't need a huge bunch of friends. Just have the right ones. And the right ones are the ones who love you the way you are, just the way you are, with all good and not so good sides.

Wow, I just saw how many blog entries I have. :lol: Back then I posted one every day! I really wonder whether I should start my lucky sentences again. It was quite fun.

So, now I forgot what I wanted to say. I've just changed my banner and my other blog banner (or whatever it is) and wow, it even worked! :lol: Still I'm having fun with the bugs and the best is when I'm the bug (means when I'm posting in the wrong threads and then can't find my posts anymore) :lol:. And because I'm just in the mood, here is a lucky sentence.

Lucky sentence:

Dream. It's important to have dreams. Because every dream can come true.

Hey everyone!

So, I have to get used to all the features we have here. :lol: Funny is, I already met the all so familiar tv.com bugs again. :lol:

Today I had an exam (and last Thursday I did as well). Boy, was I nervous before. But I always am, always scared I didn't study enough. It went well though, which is good. Now that I don't have to study I can finally read some good books again. And of course be on here. I will work on my thesis soon and I'm looking forward to my workplacement, which will hopefully be good this time.

Oh, and I'm not sure- did Susi tell you already we met? Because we did last month. Best meeting ever!

Hey! It's me, Brina. I haven't been on here for ages and I have to say I feel really bad because of it. :( I haven't really been that active on any kind of message board lately though. I hope everyone is okay and you didn't forget me already. Huge hugs and kisses to everyone!

Brina

Hey! How are you, guys? I hope everyone is good!

Well, I am. I'm relieved, especially since I quitted my workplacement again. It was really bad, and it was torturing me. It was stupid and what I had to do was stupid as well. It was a great relief when I didnt have to go there anymore. Now I'm taking some classes, working on my diploma thesis. I already have a new workplacement for next semester. And I'll even have my own office then!

Huge hugs and kisses to all of you!

4. Painful memories Lindsay was willing to tell Danny about what she had kept on hiding in front of him even after opening up about the murder of her friends. Talking about those suppressed memories wasn't easy though. She had rested her head back against his chest, her hands tightly grabbing the front of his shirt while his arms were wrapped around her in a comforting embrace again. She could feel his silence question, mixed with concern, almost fear by a reaction he already knew from her. It wasn't the first breakdown of her he had witnessed. They had always had to do with what had happened to her friends. This time was different though and he knew that. "I don't want to force you to talk to me," Danny said into the silence. "But...Lindsay, I'm just concerned, you know? And I can't help you when you don't talk to me." "I know," Lindsay whispered, pressing herself even tighter against him. She took a deep breath. Then she finally started. "There's something I didn't tell you yet," she said, her voice already shaking. "There's another reason why I wanted to come to New York so much. Because of the job of course. But also because I...needed to be away from there. It's also the reason why actually I never wanted to get involved with a co-worker again. Back in Montana, I had a relationship with one of my colleagues. His name was James Stanwick. When I joined the lab I...had always had a little crush on him. Obviously he was interested in me as well and I couldn't believe when we indeed got together. But...it was a big mistake." Lindsay felt how she started to shiver again. It was true. She could clearly remember how she had felt when she had joined the Crime Lab in Montana, motivated and excited. Of course she had been nervous how her co-workers would react to her. But luckily there had been James; a good looking man, a few years older than her, very friendly. He had instantly taken care of her, had helped her to get into the all day routine of the lab. No surprise she had gotten a crush on him. And had been surprised when he had shown her his interest as well. They had gotten together after a while and Lindsay felt like a dream had come true. Until she realised that she had gotten right into a nightmare. "What did he do to you?" Danny asked quietly. He wasn't really sure if he wanted to hear the answer. Whatever this man had done to her, it must have been horrible. Why else was she scared like that, crying and clinging to him like a child? "I thought he was in love with me," she continued. "That's also why I accepted he was jealous. He didn't like it when other guys looked at me, even when it was just a co-worker. For a while I even thought it was kinda cute. Obviously I meant a lot to him. I...needed a while until I realised he wasn't just jealous. He was obsessed. With me. He became paranoid with the time. He thought I was interested in other guys and yelled at me because of that. This already annoyed me with the time. Maybe then I just should have left him. But unfortunately I didn't." Again Lindsay paused. She had hoped she would never be confronted with her past again. Once again she had been wrong. And like all the times before, she wondered why she hadn't noticed it earlier- why hadn't she seen that something was wrong with James? Why had she kept on believing in their relationship until there was no way to escape him anymore? "What happened then?" Danny wanted to know, already expecting the worst. "His jealousy reached its top when he hit me once after I came home from work. He was mad at me because he believed I didn't have to work long but had been hanging out with someone else. I was...so shocked after that. I even left and stayed at a friend's place for the night. The next day he arrived there, crying, telling me he would never do it again. He said he didn't understand how that could have happened. He had been so concerned and he was so scared that I could break up with him because of someone else. He swore he would never do it again. And...for some reason I believed him." "But he didn't keep his promise?" Lindsay shook her head. "No. I...don't really know why I didn't just leave him. It wasn't that I believed him he wouldn't do it again when he hit me again. It was more because...I was scared of him, you know?" "What do you mean?" Danny asked. "I mean that...he threatened me," she answered. "After the second time he attacked me, I told him I wouldn't believe any excuses anymore and that he had no right to beat me. But he told me I shouldn't do such a mistake. He told me he'd find me, especially because we worked together. I shouldn't even dare to think about telling anyone that he hit me because they wouldn't believe me anyway. At first I didn't care about what he was saying. The longer I listened to him though, I...well, I was scared because I knew he was right." "You think no one would have believed you?" Danny asked shocked. Lindsay nodded sadly. "Yes. Because everyone was convinced he was such a wonderful guy. This man might be insane, but...he's smart, you know? He knew what to do to make people believe he was innocent and that I was lying. At this time I...didn't know what to do. It's a long story." Danny nodded in response. He didn't know this James, but he believed every word she was telling him. He had worked several cases of domestic violence. Sometimes he could understand that women were scared to leave their partners. They always used the same sentences to scare them; 'I will kill you when you go. You or the ones you love.', 'I will find you, no matter where you are.' or 'No one will believe you. They know me. They'll believe me, not you. And if you try it anyway, I'll do it even worse.'. Yes, he could clearly picture Lindsay in such a situation, and it shocked him. "How did you manage to escape him?" he asked. Somewhere along the line she must have been able to break up with this man. "I had luck," she said. "He owned a house, so no one really could notice what was going inside there. But obviously our neighbour had heard him beating me up one night. She came over after he left for work. I wasn't allowed to open the door when I looked like that; all bruised up. But she didn't go away. I let her in and when she saw me, she said she wouldn't go until I told her my story. After that, she promised I could stay at hers and her husband's place and she'd even testify if someone indeed questioned my story. With her help I managed to press charge against him and he was sent to prison, for five years." "Luckily," Danny answered. Instinctively he pressed her even tighter against him. He knew; this was only the short version of the story of what had happened to her. When this man had been sent to prison for a couple of years, he hadn't just hit her from time to time. "He...did that to you often?" "Yes," Lindsay whispered. "Every day he beat me up. Mostly he tried to not hit my face, so I could still go to work with no one noticing the bruises." Listening to her, Danny could hardly believe it. How cruel could a man be? And then organised like that? "Did he also...I mean..." "Rape me?" Lindsay completed his question. "Well, let's say...I was too scared to say 'no'. I did what he wanted me to do, but I didn't want it myself." Danny nodded. He knew he didn't tell her that this wasn't any different. In silence he kept on holding her for a while. He had already been shocked when he had learnt about the murder of her friends. Now he knew she had had to go through another nightmare, and once again it broke his heart. "So you had a nightmare again?" he asked then. "Did something remind you of him?" Lindsay needed a moment before she could answer. Yes, now Danny knew what James had done in the past. He didn't know about the emails yet though. But she knew this was the moment to tell him about it. Once again she closed her eyes and took a deep breath to calm herself down. Then she started to explain.

3. Nightmares

Lindsay was staring at her computer screen for several minutes now. Her face was pale, she was shivering, torn between her curiosity and fear. Curiosity because she wanted to know what she'd read in this email, once again sent by the mysterious 'oldfriend', who had tried to tell her he was one of her worst nightmares- James. Fear because she was scared of exactly that- what would she read this time? And- what if this was the clarification she needed but didn't want if she was honest? What if she'd realise that this person was indeed James, when all her hopes that this was just a joke would disappear? What would she do then?

With her hand shaking, Lindsay moved the cursor closer to the little button that said 'read email'. It cost her a lot to decide what to do. But she didn't have much time. She had told Danny to join him in the bedroom quickly. If she didn't do that soon, he'd come to check on her, and she knew she wouldn't be able to hide what was bothering her so much.

Closing her eyes, Lindsay released a little sigh. How was it possible that every time she thought she had managed to leave her past behind, it came back to the surface again, shocking her with how much it hurt? Like when she had received a letter from Montana, telling her to testify against Daniel Katums. Like now, when she was suddenly receiving weird emails.

Opening her eyes again, Lindsay remained staring at the little button for another moment. Then she just clicked it. Her heart was racing when she started to read.

Dearest Lindsay,

unfortunately I didn't receive an answer for my latest email from you yet, but of course I can understand you- we haven't seen each other for a while and you surely were surprised to hear from me.

But I need to tell you- I miss you. Today I saw you and I was impressed by how much I still feel connected to you. You're even more beautiful than ever and I wish I could have just left my car to talk to you for a bit. It's amazing how much you can miss a person and how much you want to be together with her again after only seeing her for a brief moment.

But I'm sure I don't have to wait long. I'm already planning on our first meeting after five years. I'm looking forward to it.

See you soon!

Love, James

Lindsay hadn't even finished reading the email when an old instinct already started to kick in again; flee. Run, as far as you can. He'll find you, no matter where you are. And he's close. He saw you today. He's here. And he'll find you. He always does.

She felt like the temperature in the room had gone close to the freezing point. She was shivering, not able to move. Of course even a second email was no proof. But the way the mail was written- it fitted perfectly to him. And- who else should send her mails like this?

As much as Lindsay just wanted to close her inbox and ignore this 'oldfriend', she knew her worst suspicion was right. James was back. The thought of that alone was enough to frighten her so much that she wasn't able to move. She could only stare at the email, could only reread it over and over again.

"Lindsay?" a voice barely made its way through to her. "Hey, I thought you wanted to hurry."

"I'm sorry," Lindsay answered without really noticing who she was talking to or that she was speaking at all.

"Are you okay?" the voice, which she slowly started to identify as Danny's asked her and from the increase of sound, she could tell he was coming closer. With the last bit of strength, Lindsay managed to close the email and logged out of her email account.

"Yes," she said, her voice so low she could barely understand herself. Still shaking, she grabbed the edges of the chair to get up. "Let's go to bed. I'm tired."

Without looking at him, Lindsay headed over to the bedroom, slowly to not fall and to not reveal how much she was still shivering. She prayed he wouldn't notice in what a bad mental shape she was now, wouldn't ask any questions. As quickly as possible she removed her clothes and lay down in bed, without changing into her sleeping clothes. She simply wrapped her blanket around herself and closed her eyes.

Not even a minute later, she heard Danny entering the bedroom as well. She felt how he stopped in the doorway, staring at her. But Lindsay kept on doing what she had done so many times when things had gotten difficult; she pretended she was sleeping. It had worked with James, maybe it would work with Danny as well.

He remained staring at her for what had to be minutes. Then Lindsay felt a light movement on the bed when he joined her. He lay down next to her, once again staring at her.

"I think we need to talk tomorrow," he whispered, gently running his hand through her curly hair. "Because I don't believe that everything's okay."

With that he pulled her closer, like always wrapping his arms around her in a comforting embrace. Lindsay couldn't help the tears that started to form in her eyes; tears because she was torn between the loving support of her boyfriend and the insanity of some person who couldn't stop torturing her.

--------

"Lindsay? What the hell are you doing over there?"

The cold voice of James Stanwick echoed through the room, causing Lindsay to jump backwards, away from the window, in fear. With huge, scared eyes, her hands already risen in a defending gesture, she turned around to her boyfriend, staring at him in fear.

"I...only..." she stammered.

"What?" he yelled at her, causing her to wince. Before she could explain herself more, he made his way over to her. "I told you to stay away from the damn window! Do you think I'm stupid? Did you already look into the mirror this morning? I don't want anyone to see you like that!"

'Then why did you beat me up in the first place?', Lindsay thought, but she'd never even think about daring to say that. He would simply throw her through this window then.

"I'm...sorry," she whispered.

"You're sorry? Maybe think before you act the next time!" James yelled in response.

He reached out, brutally grabbing her arm. Lindsay whimpered lightly at the pain his strong hand around her bruised arms caused. She made a half hearted attempt at pulling back, but she knew she had no chance against him. With one quick motion, he pulled her way from the window, causing her to stumble and fall. Instinctively, she curled up in a ball, trying to cover her head with her arms, knowing exactly what would happen next.

"Please, James, I'm sorry," she whimpered, but he didn't care about any apologizes. She didn't need to wait long until the first blow hit her.

"No! Please!" Lindsay screamed into the silence of the bedroom. She shot up in bed, her eyes staring into the dark, not able to understand where she was at this moment. When she felt how two strong arms wrapped around her, she released another scream, just to hear a soft, warm voice talking to her.

"Shh, it's okay," Danny whispered to her, despite her fighting pulling her closer to him to hold her in a tight, comforting embrace. "It was just a dream. Everything's okay."

Still in panic, Lindsay needed another couple of moments before she understood that this wasn't her old apartment in Bozeman and that the man at her side was Danny, not James. Finally understanding that she had indeed only been dreaming, she gave up on fighting and instead grabbed the front of Danny's shirt, burying her face in it to cry. It took her several long minutes of desperate sobbing until she felt herself slowly calming down again.

"Everything's okay," Danny kept on whispering. "I'm here. No one is going to hurt you."

Although Lindsay's mind was still spinning, the memories of what had caused those nightmares to return, was clearly present in her mind. No one could hurt her? She wasn't sure about that.

Another few minutes later, Lindsay's crying finally turned into light sobbing. She felt how Danny loosened his grip around her, carefully pulling her back a little, as good as he could. The concern in his eyes instantly found its way right into her heart.

"Lindsay?" he asked quietly, gently wiping her hair out of her wet face. "I know, maybe I should wait until you come to me, but last time you didn't and this time I won't wait. You're acting so strange since this morning. You know you can talk to me, about everything. So- what's wrong?"

For a moment Lindsay only stared back at Danny. She knew he truly cared about her and he was right; she could talk to him about everything. Cuddling back in his arms, she closed hers around him tightly. Then she started to talk.

2. James returns

James Stanwick was sitting in his car for hours now. Luckily it was dark outside and it was snowing, so no one really was in the mood to be out for a walk in the middle of the night and no one would pay attention to the car that was parked in front of the tall building of the New York Crime Lab.

New York. James still didn't understand why moving to this city had always been Lindsay's dream. He knew Bozeman, Montana was completely different to this huge city here. He liked his home town, he didn't like it when too many people were around him. It was confusing him. It was also hard; hard to always keep his facade on standing. Now of course they didn't really like him in Bozeman anymore; everyone in the small city possibly knew what he had done and why he had been in prison until a few weeks ago.

But he didn't care about those people if he was honest. Why should he? He was back and finally he was so close to making his plan work. A plan he had been creating all the time since they had sent him to prison five years ago. Now he was back and until now everything was going great.

Deep in his thoughts, James almost missed the great moment he had been waiting for all the time. But luckily he looked up just the moment she walked through the entrance door of the building. A smile instantly lit his face at the sight of the woman across the street. Lindsay.

The moment James saw her, only a few feet separating them, he felt his heart beating faster. It was amazing that this woman still had this effect on him. But he wasn't surprised by it, if he was honest. She was simply amazing. Beautiful. Sexy. Intelligent. In one sentence; the most perfect woman he had ever met in his life.

Smiling all the time, James watched the petit woman. She stopped in front of the building for a moment, hectically looking around. Her beautiful brown eyes were widened; she almost looked frightened to him. This was a reaction he had expected though. After all it had been her who had sent him to prison. But he had forgiven her. And he was willing to take her back.

As a well skilled CSI, it hadn't been difficult for James to find out where Lindsay had moved to. Her steadily repeated wish of moving to New York had been a good hint, and so he had managed to find out where exactly his ex-girlfriend was living now. To top that, he had even found out her email address. To his luck, New York owned a lot of internet cafes, and so he had finally managed to work on part one of his plan. He had sent her an email.

Of course he was smart enough to know she wouldn't be too happy at first. Especially because obviously she had another boyfriend now. But this was no hindrance for James. He was convinced; only the two of them belonged together and after all he'd get what he wanted. Like always. And this time he'd make sure that no one would be able to send him to prison again. Maybe she wouldn't be happy about meeting him first, but this'd change soon; he was sure about that.

Still smiling, James watched her heading to a near car. He had to fight hard against the urge to follow her when she started it and left the parking lot. But it was too early for that. First he had something else to do. And so he started his own car to head to his now favourite internet café again.

--------

It had taken Lindsay a lot to leave the safety of the crime lab to head home. But she couldn't stay in there forever. Nervously she had stopped in front of the building for a moment. Light shudders were running down her spine; an all too familiar feeling. She felt watched. Like he was somewhere, not far away from her.

But then she shook her head and headed over to her car. Maybe she was simply overreacting again. Of course the fear was still deep inside her, and after receiving a mail like this her reaction was only understandable. But until now it was nothing else than this; a mail. Maybe some stupid idiot had thought he could play a trick on her? Of course there was a chance it was really him. She knew he had been released from prison a few weeks ago. But would he really be so stupid and come to New York? For her? She didn't know it and couldn't be sure. This man wasn't sane; something in his mind was scaring her. But until now she had no proof that he was back.

On her way back home, the feeling of being watched started to disappear again; much to Lindsay's relief. Maybe she had really just overreacted. After such a long time she had been confronted with a part of her past she had wished she could simply leave behind forever. But then she had received this email.

Deep inside, Lindsay had wondered if keeping it to herself maybe could be a mistake. Maybe she should have just talked to Danny when he had asked her if everything was okay. Or she should have talked to Mac; the only one who knew what exactly had happened between her and James. But something had kept on holding her back. What if it really just was a joke by someone? Should she already make everyone freak out because of nothing? She had received one email so far. She should wait a bit longer, maybe for another hint. Or another email. Then it certainly was still early enough to talk.

But although Lindsay tried to convince herself that everything was okay, that this had just been some stupid mail with no meaning and no message, the strong nervousness inside her remained when she arrived at her apartment building. As quickly as possible, she left her car, locked it and rushed over to her front door. Without wasting any unnecessary minute, she made her way up to her apartment. In record time she unlocked her apartment door. Quickly she slammed the door shut.

The moment she locked her front door again, Lindsay finally could release the breath she had been holding all the time. At least in here, in her own place, she could feel save at the moment. For the case he was really out there. But until now there was still a chance he wasn't, and Lindsay would remain clinging to this chance.

"Hey Lindsay," a familiar voice suddenly caught her intention. Snapping out of her thoughts, Lindsay made a little leap, staring into the half dark of her living room. How could she forget doing something important like that after entering her place?

"Whoa, calm down," the voice spoke to her again. Lindsay needed another moment until she realised who this voice belonged to. In the pale light coming from outside through her large living room window, she saw a familiar figure approaching her; Danny.

"Oh, hey," she said, leaning back against the wooden surface of her door. Her heart was still racing and she was shivering. "I didn't expect you to be here. Or at least not to sit in my dark living room."

"I thought I should wait for you. I must have fallen asleep on the couch," Danny answered. Joining her in the hallway now, she could finally make out his face. What a great relief it was him. Not someone else. "Since when is it so easy to scare you?" She felt how his eyes focussed on her face and she was grateful for the pale light; so he wouldn't be able to see how she was blushing again.

"Oh, I think it's just because I'm...very tired," she replied, trying to smile at him.

Danny nodded. "Alright." He glanced at his watch briefly before he added, "So, are you hungry? I could quickly warm something up for you."

But Lindsay shook her head. "No, thank you. I just...want to go to bed. That's all. You know what? Why don't you already go into the bedroom? I'll join you in a few. I just go into the bathroom and check my emails."

She already wanted to gently push him towards the bedroom, but this time it was him who shook his head. "You really look tired," he said. "There is no need to spend unnecessary time in the bathroom. You can change into something else in the bedroom. And I don't think there'll be any important mails."

"I will hurry," Lindsay answered. Blushing lightly, she added, "Just let me check quickly. I'm...waiting for a mail."

Hoping that he wouldn't ask for whose mail she was waiting, she stared up at Danny. He looked back at her for a moment, before he shrugged lightly and nodded.

"Okay, but hurry," he said.

"Sure," Lindsay answered, already heading over to her computer. When she was sure Danny had gone to bed, she opened her inbox. She instantly started to shiver when she saw what she had already expected. A new email. A new email sent by 'oldfriend'.

Because for some reason I've never done that before, here's my first fanfic blog. ;) It's a fic I just started and so I thought I could share it in here. And welcome to my newest fanlist member rhylee. :)

Summary: An enemy from the past returns. What are his plans? - DL

Author's note: Thanks to Stuffy for helping me with the summary. Please read and review.

Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything.

Rating: T

It was late, far after midnight. There was hardly anyone left at the lab. Only a few lab techs were still busy with something they hadn't been able to finish earlier. Mac was sitting in his office, looking through some files. Outside it was dark, ice cold and snowing. It had started a couple of hours earlier and now the streets were already covered with a thick, white layer of snow.

It was a quiet night, like no one was willing to commit any crimes out there in this almost fairytale like snowy city. Even Mac wouldn't stay at the lab for much longer and would head home soon.

Everything was quiet, almost peaceful. But Lindsay didn't notice that. For her, this night was far away from being quiet or peaceful. For her, nothing was nice, nothing was fine. Not since she had checked her email address this morning. And had found something that had ruining everything that could have been nice about this day.

18 hours earlier:

"You know what?" a rather annoyed Lindsay said, watching Danny who had just left the shower, still completely wet, still completely naked. Usually this was something she enjoyed, but not when they had to hurry to get to work in time. Like now. "I really don't know how you manage to be at work in time all day when you're slow like that. I'm already dressed and you just finished showering"

Although she was glaring at him, her voice loud and clearly revealing she wasn't amused at all, he dared to smirk at her.

"Oh, come on, Linds," he answered. "Don't be mad at me for not hurrying. Like you said; am I ever late? No. I just don't appear at the lab half an hour before I have to be there. Why should I? No one cares anyway. As long as I'm at work at 9 am and do my work well, no one will complain." Stepping closer to her, still smirking, he rested his hands on her hips and added, "If I were you, my sweetheart, I would calm down a little. Relax."

But relaxing was something Lindsay really wasn't good in. So she just rolled her eyes at him.

"Okay. Then get dressed now anyway," she said, already heading to the bathroom door again. "I will use the time to check my emails. When I've finished doing that, I want you to be finished in here as well."

"Of course," Danny answered, still grinning at her. "And you're sure you don't want to..."

"Not now," Lindsay replied and before he could grab her again or she could change her mind, she left the bathroom.

While Danny continued to get dressed in the bathroom, she headed over to her laptop which was standing on the large desk, right next to Danny's. She didn't really know why they didn't simply share a computer and why she always took hers with her when she stayed at his place, but it was just another weird habit she didn't really bother thinking about.

While she waited for the computer to start, she listened to the sounds coming out of the bathroom, causing her to smile. How was it possible one person could make so many noises in there? It almost seemed like he was renovating in there.

Still smiling, she connected with the internet and opened her inbox. Only 1 new mail had been received. But when Lindsay saw the addresser, she hesitated. An 'oldfriend' wasn't familiar to her. But the title of the email caught her attention: 'It has been a long time since we talked, Linds'.

Still hesitant, she stared at the little symbol that said 'read'. Should she click or not? Maybe this was just another spam mail, telling her something stupid. But for some reason she couldn't help the thought that this mail had nothing to do with spam.

And so she opened it. A mistake she realised the moment she read the first few lines.

------

"I'm sorry it took me so long, Montana," Danny said when he left the bathroom, finally dressed. "I know, you think it's overdone to take care of my hair so much, but it really looked like crap this morning."

Lindsay, who was still sitting in front of her computer, snapped out of her thoughts, looking up at him with huge eyes.

"What?" she asked. She hadn't understood anything he had said.

"Uh...I just said something about my hair," Danny answered, lightly raising his eyebrows. "Is everything okay? You're quite pale. Is something wrong?"

"Oh, no, no," Lindsay replied, quickly closing the laptop. "No, I'm good. Just a bit...tired. That's all."

Danny watched her for a moment and she wondered if he believed her excuse. She wasn't really able to interpret the expression of his face.

"Okay," he said then, obviously not really convinced. "But you know...when something's wrong, no matter what it is..."

"I will come to you. I know," she answered, trying to smile at him as good as possible. But it was hard to ignore the cold feeling of fear that kept on rising inside her. "Can we go now?"

"Of course," Danny replied, already grabbing his jacket. "Let's hope we won't have too much to do today."

Lindsay only nodded in response. Grabbing the back of the chair, she managed to get up from her sitting position. Her legs were shaking and she wondered if she'd make it to the front door where her jacket was hanging. Her whole body was shivering, inside, not visible to anyone luckily.

This feeling was only too familiar. A cold, frightening feeling, sending shivers down her spine, causing her heart to beat faster and faster, making her hands sweat. Fear.

Who would have thought she'd feel like this again? Who would have thought one stupid email would make her feel like that? One stupid email. Maybe it was nothing else than a fake, but deep inside something was telling her that this email was reality. And her fear wouldn't be everything that'd come back to her.

------

It was late and almost everyone had left the lab already. Lindsay was still sitting at her desk, staring at the email she had kept on rereading for at least an hour now. The fear had increased during the day and it had become harder and harder to hide it in front of Danny; one reason why she hadn't gone home yet. This, and the fact that she was scared to leave the building anyway.

Once again, she let her eyes wander over the few lines:

'Dearest Lindsay,

I know, we haven't talked for a long while. You have no idea how much I missed you since I saw you for the last time. Don't ask me how much time I have spent with staring at your picture, admiring your beauty.

But now it's only a question of time until I will be able to see you in person again. Luckily I found out you moved to New York and I also found out your email address. I'm on my way, sweetheart. I'm looking forward to seeing you again, and this time I won't leave. I promise.

Love, James'

It was just an email. Even a friendly email. There was nothing that would frighten a person when they read those few lines.

But Lindsay knew the person who had sent it to her. She knew how much danger every of those words meant.

It was only a question of time until they'd meet again. The thought of that alone caused her fear to almost overwhelm her. And she knew; there was no way to hide. He'd find her. He always did. And right now she didn't know what to do.

Good evening!!!!!!!!!!

Lucky sentence:

Luck is knowing who your true friends are!

This lucky sentence means a lot to me, because it's so true. I met tons of people, people who I thought were my friends. In real life I got rid of those false friends and now have two friends who I really know like me the way I am, and not because they hope they have an advantage because they're friends with me. So I met a lot of people. And I realised- not everyone who tells you they are your friends are in fact your friends. You guys for example. You're true friends. I always realise that when I come here and you all welcome me so nice and friendly, no matter how long I've been away. I immediately feel home. And I promise, no matter how weird this board here likes to act (still need to get used to the 'new' layout), I will stay here. I also met some other awesome friends. Friends who sent me Christmas cards. Friends who I can talk to every day, who I got in contact with because we both complained about bad dubbing, and now are close friends. Or they do something nice for you, just because they like to share and are friendly.

What I want to say with that is- people can say a lot. But only time shows who your real friends are. Like you guys. I love you guys and I'm proud to be your friend because I know I can trust in you. Same with those other few people who show me they really care about me and like me the way I am.

So yes, luck is knowing who your real friends are.

Have a great day!

See you soon! xxx